June 15th - part of June 20th

Received "the call" today!  Sammy has been cleared for travel clearance and is scheduled to arrive in LAX with a family returning from the Birthland Tour June 20th!!!!!!!!!  Just 9 days after Passport was issued!  I quickly made travel arrangements, (tickets taken care of by friend who is a retired AA pilot) called my sister-in-law who was traveling with us and told her to start packing, and then started the difficult task of trying to figure out what I should pack for Sammy.  I had no clue how many clothes, diapers, toys, bottles or formula to have on hand.  I was freaking out!  I think I packed and re-packed our bags 10 times before I felt semi-confident that we had everything we could possibly need.  Jordan kept reminding me that we were not going to third world country and that anything we forgot we could go buy once we got there.  

We arrived in LA on the 19th and had most of the day and some of the next morning to kill before we would head back to the airport to meet Sammy.  So we did what any normal tourist would do while in L.A......we hunted for movie stars.  We didn't hit the "hot spots" or anything, we just kept our eyes peeled.  I don't really know why because we wouldn't have asked for an autograph or picture.  We would have just gawked and then had a good story to tell.   I  just needed something to distract me from the millions of butterflies fluttering around in my stomach and this pretty much did the job.  Unfortunately we saw zero famous people.  We did eat some good food and enjoyed the LA weather though.  The next morning we walked to a little shopping area just down the street from our hotel to help fill the time until we headed for the airport.  I remember that the stores weren't open yet so we sat on a bench outside and waited for someone to unlock a door.  I could hear the sound of Jordan and Melinda's (SIL) voices but I had no idea what they were saying.   I was silently counting down the hours and minutes until I was with my baby.  I knew Jordan was doing the same in his head, but he was capable of behaving normally on the outside.  Today I didn't want to shop, or talk, or fill my time with anything while we waited.  I just wanted to sit in silence and wait.  I wanted to be left alone with my thoughts.  Would I be a good Mom? Would Sammy cry and be afraid of us?  Would he bond quickly, or would he have a long grieving process?  Did I pack enough diapers? What if his flight was delayed, or changed and no one called us?  Did I pack enough clothes?  What if he hates his carseat, do I just hold him in the cab on the way back to the hotel?  Oh, I hope he sleeps well tonight!  I wonder if he is going to be super chubby and not fit into the clothes I brought for him.  Did I pack enough formula? Will he love me as much as I love him?

Even though I was being ridiculously obsessive,  I still was finding comfort mulling over my fears and doubts.  Sounds weird, but it made it all seem more real.  This was happening!   I was 2 hours away from being on my way to the airport.  And then I was going to be 1 hour away from my son's flight landing, and then I would be another hour away from him finally being in my arms.  Soon, my life would be changed forever!

Walking the streets of L.A. 

(in our hotel room)

Gossip magazines are one of my weaknesses, and while most people I know won't buy them (except for my older sister...it's her fault I love them so much), they can't resist picking one up if it's just laying next to them.  Including YOU Melinda! :)  And you know you enjoyed it! ;)